An Eye on the Prize

Maybe it’s something about autumn that leads me to flights of rhetorical fancy. It is, after all, my spiritual springtime. Even as a child in Florida, the first chilled breezes free of humidity awakened something, like a breath sweeping in from the horizon, ushering in the promise of change. I mention this because in preparing this post I at one point sought out one from the past. Sure enough I found it, planted in November 2021. Drawing from a similar vein, today’s post isn’t so much about craft as it is inspiration, possibly even hope. Because heaven knows we need that now. This is my gentle nudge to look beyond the uncertainty hanging over us, and to instead focus on our purpose.

My message is simple, a phrase we’ve heard our whole lives but discount far too often – Keep your eye on the prize.

So, let’s get to it, shall we?

Wild Cards and Wise Words

This summer I stumbled upon a wonderful new podcast. NPR describes Wild Card as “part-interview, part-existential game show.” I call it fascinating. Rachel Martin is a talented host with a gift for conversational exploration. And the team behind the show has done an amazing job finding individuals from a variety of creative backgrounds to delve into topics that strike resonating chords in a fresh, inviting way.

The concept is intriguing. Martin engages guests via a series of card options, each with open-ended questions intended to spur discussion on, well, whatever comes to mind. The questions themselves touch upon memory, belief, life lessons. Past questions have included the following:

• What is a recurring dream from your childhood?
• How does grief inform your life?
• Is there a place that shaped you as much as a person did?

 

Last week’s guest was Erykah Badu, a singer songwriter some call “the Queen of Neo-soul.” Badu’s music combines elements of jazz, soul and pop, delivered with a voice reminiscent of Billie Holiday (though she is quick to point out that many artists influence her). Embarrassingly, until the podcast I had never heard of Badu. But her response to one question made me take instant notice. Badu was asked, “Is there anything you long for?”

This was her response: “Yes. I want to get my best work out of me, because it’s still in me. And I feel it. And something in me can’t let it go yet. I long for that moment that I’m able to let that go and give it to the world.”

Wow! Talk about cutting to the chase. I had my own driveway moment evaluating my own life choices. And you know what? It felt wonderful. Because for the first time in weeks, I was swimming in my world instead of tussling against currents beyond my control. That realization was my spark for today.

How does one get back to what truly matters? How do we rediscover the things we love and the things that motivate us, both creatively and personally?

Make an Honest Assessment

One lesson from my life, which I have to relearn on occasion (and my answer to another Wild Card question), is sometimes you need to spell out the obvious.

These are not normal times. They haven’t been for a while, and off-ramps appear scarce on the near horizon. Maybe the idea of “normal” has always been a bit of an illusion, but where we are now is decidedly unsettled.

It is, as they say, what it is.

All we can do as individuals is take stock of our own circumstances. What is working? What is not? Reflect upon the things you need to change, right now, to alleviate the most prevalent sources of stress. This can mean anything from turning off the news or limited social media to distancing yourself from individuals and groups that strain your psyche. It is ok to say “no,” even to those with whom you share a bond. Loyal friends will understand.

At the same time, don’t isolate yourself from people and activities that can bring joy, but which are now struggling. Perhaps it is simply time to change the dynamic. Find new ways to engage. If coffee chats you once you enjoyed together now slip into mutual despair, step outside. Fall is an excellent time for walks. Meet up at a farmer’s market. Explore a new hobby together, or revisit ones from an earlier time.

The key is acknowledging when old patterns no longer work. When that is the case, the way forward is to forge a new path.

Nurture your Health

Speaking of old patterns, for as long as I can recall, nature hikes have grounded me. Endorphins flowing, I’ve always felt I could solve most any issue, from tricky plot points to important life decisions, during a trek up the side of a mountain. To my dismay, lately that hasn’t been nearly enough. All too often, my thoughts get snagged on the sources of anxiety rather than how to move beyond them. It isn’t healthy. I can feel it isn’t in the ways it disrupts my sleep and saps my energy. As someone largely blessed with good health, I know if I am carrying an anchor of emotional weight, others most certainly are as well.

There is no quick remedy, and this isn’t a scold. But continuing our honest assessment, it is essential in these times that we guard our health – mental, physical and spiritual. Do what you can, as often as you can, to strengthen your body and expand your mind. From breathing exercises to hearty aerobics to nutritious dining choices, every bit helps. For we need our strength, now more than ever.

Believe in Yourself

Another exchange from the podcast interview sticks with me. Martin asked Erykah the following: “What emotion do you understand more than all the others?” Badu’s response floored me. I want to share it in full because she expresses it so well.

“The emotion I understand more than all the others is authenticity. Yeah, there’s a feeling. When you’re being authentic, you feel it and everyone else feels it. And it becomes a magnet to everything you can desire because you’re being you. That means that everything in your body is functioning at peace and at rest, your breath, your heart rate. And you begin to attract the things and people naturally because everything is in order. It’s a divine order when you’re being yourself. That means thinking your thoughts and using your brain and your idea, boundaries, concepts, vision, belief. Unwavering faith in yourself, that’s the greatest emotion.”

These words resonate deeply with a strength I’ve let slip in recent years, that of knowing myself and trusting my instincts. When things you thought you knew about your family, your community or even your country are called into question, you must hold fast to faith in yourself. Earlier this week, shortly after hearing the interview, my partner and I attended a screening of “To Kill a Mockingbird” at a local pop-up cinema. As a child of the South, with deep Alabama roots on my mother’s side, the movie and novel have long resonated with me. They connect me with observations from my grandmother, whose parents were sharecroppers. She instilled in me the idea that ultimately, regardless of upbringing or wealth, people are just people, most of them good and simply wanting happiness for themselves and their loved ones.

I am not ashamed to say I shed a few tears while watching the film. There, in the darkened theater, feelings of mourning I’ve been stifling bubbled up. I finally released my sense of loss in a belief that, despite whatever individual flaws we possess, communities in time can and will overcome the darker vestiges of human nature.

Given time to reflect in the days since, I realize I don’t have to lose the faith. I happen to believe my grandmother’s words still ring true. Now more than ever, it is important to trust our better angels, and to speak on their behalf. It is how we learn from each other. It’s what makes us strong.

Those are my musings on a blustery, rainy November evening. I would love to hear your thoughts. What are your challenges these days? How are you overcoming them? What advice do you have for getting to those parts holding us back and letting them sing?

And for those interested, here are links to the full interview with Erykah Badu and a brief intro to her music – 1) Wild Card, Nov 17 and 2) an Erykah Badu essential playlist.