Of Clams & Editors
By Guest | March 15, 2015 |
Today’s guest is Shawn Coyne–a twenty-five year book-publishing veteran. He’s edited, published or represented works from Michael Connelly, Robert McKee, Bill Murray, Joe Namath, Steven Pressfield, Jerry Rice, Betty White, and many others.
During his years as an editor at the Big Five publishing houses, as an independent publisher, as a literary agent both at a major Hollywood talent agency and as head of Genre Management Inc., and as a bestselling co-writer and ghostwriter, he created a methodology called The Story Grid to evaluate, edit and write stories. His goal is to make the work eminently practical…to remind writers that they are not the problem…the problems are the problem. His book isn’t yet available but it will be soon. Watch this space — StoryGrid.com — to stay on top of the book’s release. Word has it that it should be out mid-April or so.
Shawn comes to us today through a two-thumbs-up recommendation from one of our own, Jan O’Hara. “Two thumbs up” might be a clam, by the way. Read on and find out. And learn more about Shawn and The Story Grid on his website.
Of Clams & Editors
One of the things I love about professional cultures is their idiosyncratic insider language.
Football coaches pepper their speech with phrases like dime backs, wildcats, and now more than ever, thanks to Bill Belichick, tackle eligible.
Contractors speak of plumb lines, narrowbacks, and 220s.
Buildings and Grounds men, i.e. New England college custodians (a fraternity of which I was proudly a member) prefer not to slop out hoppers (toilets), but would rather spend the day in some form of bucket (seats on top of riding mowers or inside delivery trucks). One of my old colleagues was so adept at angling driving assignments we referred to him simply as “Buckets.” So much so that to this day I don’t remember his Christian name.
And if a B&G man has to “ring out the mop,” while there is a trip to the rest room involved, there is no requirement that an actual mop be in hand… During an evening’s after hours imbibing of beer with the fellas, young B&G guys figure out this turn of phrase pretty quickly.
By far my favorite insider-ism amongst professional writers is “clams.”
I first heard of “the clam” from a friend of mine who worked in the writers’ room for a big successful TV show in the 1990s. She got in the room in the first place with a hall of fame worthy performance in chutzpadik.
She had the audacity to write an entire episode for this huge show on spec and then took it all the way to the end of the line when she overnighted the script to the executive producer. A cousin knew an agent who knew the doorman at the exec’s building etc.
The guy actually read her spec, loved it and called her in. One rule still reigns…if you have the writing chops, you’ll find work. Guaranteed.
When she went into the writers’ room to meet the rest of the scribes, she felt like she’d walked into a support group at the JCC on Manhattan’s upper west side. She’d found her creative home. And the executive producer filled out his roster with an indispensible craftsman.
The way the writers’ room worked was this:
Each summer all of the writers flew to Los Angeles and camped out for a few weeks together to write up that entire year’s series bible. The bible would be the overarching story for the twenty odd episodes for that year. So all of the characters in the show would be analyzed and put through their paces and the group would sketch out beginnings, middles, and ends for all twenty episodes. And then the executive producer would divide up the episodes and each writer was responsible for writing up the first drafts for two or three episodes each for the season. He wrote first drafts too!
When the show went into production, the script was passed out to all of the writers in the room and together they edited it to perfection before the cameras rolled.
This group of writers was spectacular and absolutely supportive of one another. While I’m sure there was some pettiness and jealousy among them, when they went into the room all of that crap was put aside. What mattered was the work. But that didn’t mean they beat each other up.
Instead they tried to tactfully express that perhaps a line or two in a particular script was not perfect quite yet. The phrase they all used to describe lines that had entered the popular culture and had subsequently worn out their welcome was that the line was “a clam.”
Here are some examples of clams.
“That went well.” This is a tagline that usually happens just after something goes horribly wrong.
“You had me at hello.” It was great one time…in Cameron Crowe’s Jerry McGuire.
“Too much information.” Who knows where this came from, but it’s time for us to stop repeating it.
“…Not that there’s anything wrong with that.” Ah Seinfeld… Can’t we please let the last century of brilliance from Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David rest? They’re still writing great stuff now…let’s focus on that.
The derivation of the term “clam” came from two television producers on the show Murphy Brown in 1992…Peter Tolan and Michael Patrick King. Click here for a really fun story on the coining of the term from The New York Times.
Anyway, my friend used to tell a story about how she’d unwittingly written a clam in one of her drafts. The other writers had certainly done the same thing in their pasts, so all of them were a bit reluctant to call her on it.
So they were saying things like…
Ummm. Maybe we should take another look at that line on page six…?
And
I’m not sure about that line either. For some reason I think it may be a bit too…uh… familiar?
And because it was like 4 o’clock in the morning and my friend’s ability to manage her emotions had left her hours before, she lost it.
OKAY! OKAY! IT’S A FUCKING CLAM! JUST SAY IT!
They all nodded and then together they came up with a unique and better line.
I love that story.
Here’s why:
The writers’ room and the methods by which long form, episodic television is made are a great way to think about how to edit your novel or narrative nonfiction. The only difference is that your own private writers’ room requires just a quorum of one.
You.
Writing the first draft of your work is great. Congratulations! Getting that 80,000 or 100,0000 words on paper is an outstanding accomplishment.
But, having a first draft for a professional writer is the equivalent of Michelangelo finally managing to get a two thousand pound block of marble into his studio.
Once you have a first draft, it’s time to give the sensitive and delicate writer within you a vacation. Let her go to the Bahamas. She’s earned the trip.
But now, you must unleash that critical beast within you, your inner editor. You’ve got to hammer away at that rock.
You’ve probably been told a million times not to beat up on your poor writer self, not to fix your work until you get to the very end. And that’s true!
But now you’ve literally typed THE END.
So now is the time to stop bullshitting yourself. You must have the courage to call out all of the clams in your writing. This is what pros do.
What is required of you is to pull all of your inner analytical forces together and take stock of what is actually inside that hunk of marble you slogged into your studio.
You have to EDIT your book now.
But couldn’t you just hire someone else to do it?
Sure, but why pay someone to tell you what you already know?
You know that there is a bunch of soft, gooey stuff in your book. You know you fudged some scenes to get to the end of a story sequence. You know that you didn’t payoff the setup in your third scene in the thirtieth scene the exact way you wanted to.
What you need is a methodology to help you focus. You need to think from the outside/in.
Here’s my deal.
I’m a twenty-five year veteran of book publishing. I made my bones at the Big Five publishing houses as an acquisitions editor. I run a publishing company now, Black Irish Books, with bestselling author Steven Pressfield (The War of Art etc.) and I’ve ghostwritten a number of bestselling books (fiction and nonfiction).
I’ve personally edited hundreds of books and proposals and represented big million dollar deals as an agent. Hang in there…this isn’t about me. I’m just letting you know that I’m a grizzled vet, not Joe Schmoe from Kokomo with an idea.
I’ve spent my entire career studying Storytelling from a very analytical point of view and I’ve combined everything I’ve learned into an editorial methodology and philosophy that I call The Story Grid: What Good Editors Know.
It will be in book form soon, and I’d love you to buy it, but it’s okay if you don’t.
What’s not okay is to settle for clams.
Here is why I spent decades compiling and then three years writing what editors know into actual prescriptive words:
Stories are the most important things we humans can create.
I’ve read so many clams in my career that I’ve made it my mission to teach writers how to get them out of their work before an agent or an editor or an actual reader experiences them. It’s important work.
So if you want to get rid of your clams, go to www.storygrid.com. It’s free and you’ll get everything you need there. You’ll learn how to become the best editor you’ll ever need.
You.
Time to out yourselves. Are there clams in your writing? What are they?
Many thanks to today’s guest.
You can read more WU guest posts by visiting this link.
Shawn–I just love the diagrams on your website and your approach to explaining the craft of editing from a storytelling angle. Consider me one of your early buyers for The Story Grid. I should be finished studying my current craft book (Anatomy of Story by John Truby) by April, so the timing’s perfect.
(Thanks Jan for a great find! Let me weigh in and we’ll make this four thumbs up.)
Hi John,
Feel free to sample all of the material at storygrid.com before purchasing. The book itself is very much a reiteration of what I’m giving away for free. The thing is that when I was a pup in the business with no capital (money) but a lot of inner desire, there was no source to learn my craft (Editing).
The craft still isn’t formally recognized by higher education or even as a discipline to learn within the industry…just sort of a catch as catch can deal.. So that’s why The Story Grid material exists in the first place. To show people what editors actually do. Hey, if a ton of people buy the book, that’s fantastic. But the whole deal is sort of a gift to my old newbie self when I needed help and few were interested in lending a hand. Hoping it helps someone today like I was a quarter century ago.
Anyway, glad you’re interested and hope my methodology helps.
All the best,
Shawn
Welcome to WU, Shawn. It feels like two worlds colliding (I’m a big fan of the Pressfield blog, so you’re very familiar). And great timing. I happen to be editing a project, and know about a consensus of one. It happens to be a consensus that couldn’t be reached in yesterday’s session. I’d added a new element to the climactic scene, and it worked. But in previous drafts there had been two other elements that I thought worked, too. I wanted all three, but the added element makes them feel forced. The scene now feels drawn out, overwrought even. The old elements feel like clams. Not so much that they use cliched phrasing. More that they feel like overly familiar scene punctuation, if you know what I mean.
I read the scene, and was almost ready to move on, but my gut wouldn’t let me. The whole thing needs a nice clean rewrite, highlighting the new element, and making the other two go away. It was a sinking feeling last evening. But knowing it, and seeing that my consensus of one was effective, is strangely heartening today.
Will definitely buy the book! Thanks for bringing your wisdom and experience to WU. I’ll share the post on the WU group page. Thanks to Jan, too, for bringing about the colliding worlds!
Hi Vaughn,
Thanks for the welcome. Glad to hear your a fan of my pal Steve Pressfield. Steve and I have been in this nutty game together since 1996 when I acquired GATES OF FIRE for Doubleday. I published THE WAR OF ART too when I had my David versus the Goliaths Publishing company Rugged Land from 2000 to 2007.
As for the whole Clam business, we all know when we’re “cheating” in our storytelling. That is, we’ve used someone else’s stuff in a way that was easier than coming up with something fresh. I’m as much of a Clammer as the next person as a few have tactfully pointed out.
The trick is to be satisfied with our work…that we’ve done the best we could…under the circumstances/
From one Story Nerd to another, thanks.
Shawn
Hello Shawn,
I have been following all your posts on Story Grid for some time now, so I’m really happy to see you showing up here! I’m a fellow story nerd, who can’t wait to start working on a spreadsheet for my current WIP.
But I’m going to follow your advice from a recent post over at Steven Pressfield’s site, which is: Don’t Look Back. First draft first, then the editing.
Can’t wait to buy your book!
Deb
Hi Deb,
Thanks for following the stuff at story grid. And yes, don’t look back with your first draft. No one will see it but you. Let the clams take their place where they will. You can fix them later.
All the best
Shawn
Welcome, Shawn. I’m a huge fan of Steven Pressfield’s work. There is another word for clams: cliches. Writers have a tendency in the first draft when they get stuck to spout forth a cliche. I’ve done it countless times. I wish I had cliche finder software. Cliches are the scourge of the amateur writer. Beyond getting rid of cliches revision involves a granular analysis of the work that is tedious but necessary. Thanks for the words of wisdom. I can’t wait to read your book.
True CG. My feeling about first drafts is to let the cliches fall where they will. And clams. No need to beat yourself up about it. You can fix ’em later.
All the best
Shawn
Love this post. I also follow Pressfield, so am familiar with your name.
Put me on the list for the new book. I am completing my first draft of an historical novel and looking forward to the help on editing and revising.
Thanks.
Thanks Irene,
No need to drop the cash on the book until you’re sold on the methodology. Feel free to read through everything on http://www.storygrid.com until you’re convinced the resource is worth it. No problem if it’s not your thing.
Yours,
Shawn
So many clams in that article . . . was that purposeful?
“I made my bones …”
“… big million dollar deals …”
I kid, but is there not a place for clams? There’s a clam I do like: why reinvent the wheel?
Some phrases work their way into ordinary language to the point that even if an author is not using them, they will come to a reader’s mind.
So, when is a clam not a clam?
Disclaimer: not that there is anything wrong with it, but I am not a pro. Wait, is that too much information?
Hi ejdalise,
Well…to answer your question…yes and no. I did drop “made my bones” in there for fun. Irony is always appealing to a writing audience I think. Anyway, I’m the first to admit my writing ain’t for everyone. That’s why I’m primarily an editor. And you’re right about clams and cliches becoming part and parcel of everyday language over time. I just think it’s better if you can coin your own phrase if possible. But sometimes a clam can sneak through. Even for the best of ’em.
Yours,
Shawn
Please understand, Mr. Coyne, I wasn’t calling you out, and I suspect you are a much better writer than most.
Humor aside, I asked the question for two reasons.
One, it seemed to me that coining a new phrase both puts an additional burden on the writer and runs the risk of the reader missing the intent of the new phrase.
Two, unless one is a famous writer, a new phrase might be seen forced if not outright presumptuous.
The TV show example you gave illustrates my point; TV shows strive for that magical phrase that will “catch on” and become a clam. Avoiding clams make sense in that context, especially if the clam risks a reference to another and possibly competing show.
Anyway, thanks for the response; I’m in the process of reading your material and I am finding it useful.
You turned a sleepy Sunday morning into a fireworks show for me. I just spent some time looking at the grid for Silence of the Lambs. Is ‘blown away’ a clam? I, too, will be looking for your book, although your website alone constitutes a master class. I do have a question. In your post ‘Tracking the Scene” you talk about story value. Is the the same as ‘what’s at stake?” I go to work this morning with my head spinning, which is an indicator for me that I’ve learned something. Digesting is another matter. Thank you!
Shawn–
Judging from the clarity of this guest post, I’m convinced your twenty-five years in the business weren’t spent at the water cooler. I look forward to visiting your website, and perhaps reading your book.
I say “perhaps,” because guides and self-help manuals for writers, videos and tutorials–some even offering supplemental workbooks–have become their own, very busy genre.
You are here today as part of a marketing strategy for your own book, and that makes perfect sense: this is a site for writers, and one of the best.
But at some point, the number of people with lots of street cred in the business who have made their bones in publishing (both clams, don’t you think?) start to make it difficult for the writer. How can s/he know which new book/video/class will actually provide something fresh and valuable, as opposed to re-packaging basic information by using a new set of catch phrases?
Please don’t be offended. It’s not the money, it’s the time. I am something of a contrarian, made that way by other people in the business, also heavy-laden with street cred: a high-profile book marketer who did a great job of selling herself, but nothing for my work; agents (more than one) who took me on, talked a good game (another clam), but got me no deal.
Even so, I need help and am always looking for it. And I’ve found a lot of it at Writer Unboxed, including an excellent editor and an honest-broker marketer. For that reason, I definitely plan to learn more about you and your work.
Hi Barry,
Totally get it. Another old clam “take what you need and leave the rest” is applicable here.
Yours
Shawn
What a great article. I had not heard the term “clam” before, but I loved the story of your writer friend. I’ve collaborated on project before, which isn’t the same as a writers’ room, but there are similarities in how we approached rewrites. And I always appreciated having another creative mind working with me.
“But, having a first draft for a professional writer is the equivalent of Michelangelo finally managing to get a two thousand pound block of marble into his studio.” What a great analogy.
As for “clams” cliches, or simply over-used wordage and phrases, I think we all litter our work with those in the first draft. After all, we are writing what comes to mind first, and what comes to mind first is so ordinary. One challenge as we start to chip away at that block of marble is to find the not-so-ordinary wordage.
Hi Maryann,
First drafts are perfectly fine to have clams and cliches galore. There is no harm using them as placeholders or even letting a few slip into the final draft as long as you make that concrete choice.
Yours
Shawn
Welcome aboard Captain Coyne.
I’m just back from the newbie tour of your site. As a student of McKee, Truby, and our own wunderkinds Maass and Corbett (and many others on WU), I am struck with several old truths seeming new. First, story is story; it springs from (and leads) the patterns of mind assimilating environment and being. Second, each master of the craft of story–as well as each writer and reader–comes to it slightly differently. It’s like any skill. Even though the automobile and all of its problems are well known and the tools have been designed to meet those challenges, each mechanic develops her own way of using those tools.
And watching a skilled master at work–in this case, you at your blog–every reader and writer learns something new, often something other teachers hadn’t yet managed to touch. It’s like peering into a diamond from the facets cut into its face. Thanks for stopping by and I look forward to more interaction with you.
“Clams” scrambled = “calms”, which is definitely what we won’t want to do to our readers.
Delighted you’re here today, Shawn. Between you, Pressfield and McKee, I feel like I’m finally grasping the principles of story mechanics. I’m looking forward to your book’s release.
Hi Jan,
Thanks for recommending me to Therese.
All the best
Shawn
Shawn, more than one writer I know has sung the praises [warning: clam alert!] of your Story Grid material. I’m going to hie myself over and dig in. And you have double cred too, working with Steven Pressfield, who not only seems like a genius, but a good, down-to-earth [clam?] guy too.
I admire your sense that stories truly matter—and that soft, gooey ones matter less. Hope we see more of you at WU.
Thanks Tom,
Appreciate it and I hope something is helpful for you over at storygrid.com.
Yours
Shawn
“Having a first draft for a professional writer is the equivalent of Michelangelo finally managing to get a two thousand pound block of marble into his studio.” Great visual! I’m in the chiseling phase at the moment and I’ve been figuring out what to do with clams and barnacles and whole shipwrecks that must go. Will be checking out the Story Grid soon. Thanks for this entertaining and inspiring post.
Thanks Erin,
Hope something lands over for you at storygrid.com too.
All the best
Shawn
From the first blog post I started applying the gird to my novel – what a difference it’s made in over all story, plot and scene drafting. I’m usually a ‘panser’, but incorporating the ‘storygrid’ into even the first draft has saved me hours of frustration and backpedaling. Anticipating I’ll find the Editorial Microscope just as useful.