Let’s Talk About Anxiety & The Creative Process
By Dan Blank | April 26, 2013 |
photo by FlickrJunkie
“People will do anything to alleviate their anxiety.”
This is a quote from a recent episode of Mad Men, that to me, underscores the everyday context that no one talks about publicly.
I work with writers, and find that anxiety is a very real and very constant part of their lives. Why? Just a few reasons:
- The act of creating and publishing invites judgement, especially self-judgement.
- Being a writer is often a new identity that one carves out for themselves, while everyone else around them clings to other ways of labeling them: mother, spouse, colleague, sister. They don’t easily accept defining the writer as such.
- The “return on investment” of writing breaks traditional models. We do it for so many reasons, but the common reward of money is rarely the primary driver.
- There are so many decisions involved in being a writer. First, with the process of writing and editing, then the process of choosing how to publish, and then the process of finding and connecting with readers. Each is not one step, but 1,000 decisions. None of which are clear from the start.
This is, of course, not exclusive to writers.
But what I find again and again is that we don’t talk about our anxiety. We don’t admit that we have anxiety. We don’t talk about how crippling it feels. That it can bathe one’s days and nights in a foggy cloud of uncertainty and panic. That we make decisions out of fear that stems from anxiety, not because they are the best things for us.
Our anxiety is often hidden, masked behind common expressions, and simplistic answers to the question, “How are you doing?!” And when we express the anxiety to friends or colleagues, it is often explained away with simple solutions to complex problems. You get responses such as “Ah, don’t worry about it,” or “You are doing great, you worry too much!”
Our anxiety is always relative, and truth be told, sometimes other people’s anxiety can seem insignificant on the surface. When someone expresses that they don’t know whether to self-publish or not, or they are nervous about a book reading, you rarely feel the depth of their anxiety. To you, it is a logical decision, and one that likely won’t have crushing ramifications one way or another. But to the person with the question, they can get lost in the internal debate in their head, where all potential success as writer hangs in the balance.
I work from a Starbucks three hours per day, and constantly overhear conversations such as someone confiding in a friend or even a professional advisor. People talk of simple situations between themselves and a colleague at work, or how they can’t decide which car to buy. And even though these issues could seem small on the outside, these people are torn.
It is not a problem that only affects one type of person or another. One early morning at Starbucks, I was one of three people there, the other two was a 50 year old man speaking with his financial advisor. In the space of 45 minutes, I overheard every aspect about his financial life. I was not trying to eavesdrop, but they were speaking loudly, and being the only other person there, I couldn’t NOT hear the conversation.
On the surface, the man portrayed “problems” many of us would love to have:
- He owns a small successful company. But he had endless concerns about management decisions arising from his upcoming move.
- He is choosing to relocate to a beautiful town several states away with his wife to which he is happily married, but was very concerned that he wouldn’t like it there.
- His current home is worth about $1 million dollars. While his financial advisor encouraged him to sell it, the man wanted to keep it so that his college age daughter could use it on breaks.
Wouldn’t we all love to have the option of keeping an extra $1 million dollar home as a backup in case your kid needs to stay there for a night? But the thing is, even though this man has everything, you can tell he is losing sleep over these decisions. Anxiety permeated everything he said.
I remember reading an interview with Leonardo DiCaprio in Rolling Stone where he talked about his anxiety and how it affects him on a daily basis:
“It’s crazy how your mind will become this database to make you worry about things that are so arbitrary. I have a well-organized life, and I’ve put a lot of thought into the things that I do, and then, you know my stomach will be… I’ll just be sitting there, totally anxious about something ridiculous.”
I have heard and witnessed this a lot from those who are successful: success does not solve these problems. Jim Carrey offers this quote:
“I wish everyone could get rich and famous and everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that’s not the answer.”
So what do we do with this? What is the solution? Well, we can’t extinguish anxiety, it is a natural thing. It is actually there to protect us, giving us the wherewithal to consider potential threats. But in the modern world, it can close many people in.
We have to develop skills to help cope with anxiety. You won’t get rid of anxiety by solving one specific problem, you can only find ways of dealing with it that are positive, instead of crushing.
In other words: money is never the answer. A single decision is never the answer.
I run my own company, and every decision about it falls on my shoulders. Likewise, I spend my days working with writers, each the sole decision-maker for their journey as a writer. I do not have all the answers. But what follows are some strategies and tactics that I have found to work in managing anxiety.
Like most things, there are no easy answers. Be wary of those who offer them. Instead, there are processes and habits that help build the skill of building what you dream, without quite as much crushing anxiety:
LISTEN TO OTHER PEOPLE’S ANXIETY
When you realize others suffer from anxiety as you do, that can be comforting. Too often, we believe the masks that others put on that life is perfect, and feel isolated that only OUR lives are full of fear and uncertainty.
Everyone is uncertain.
Listening to others does not only provide the empathy they may need, it tends to put things in perspective. You realize you are not alone in this uncertainty; that others have similar issues that they work through; that those who are successful are not so because everything is easy for them, but rather, that they have been brave enough to work through the hard stuff.
My favorite website on the internet is Mixergy.com. Period. The site is pretty simple: Andrew Warner does hour-long interviews with successful entrepreneurs about their journey building a company.
What you find again and again in these interviews, and what Andrew is amazing at digging into, is the crippling anxiety that comes with these journeys. The stuff that gets washed away after one finds success because it seems embarrassing or insignificant.
What I hear again and again is that all success is filled with anxiety.
I remember once when Andrew interviewed successful venture capitalist Fred Wilson, who is perhaps best known as an investor in Twitter, Tumblr, and Foursquare. Andrew asked him if he worries, and Fred gave an emphatic “yes” response, that he can’t sleep sometimes because he is trying to work through decisions. This is a man who has had wild success, has an incredible family, and is a leader in his field. And he cannot escape anxiety anymore than you or I can.
TALK TO PEOPLE ABOUT HAVING ANXIETY
Oftentimes, being heard is the greatest cure for anxiety. Ze Frank recently posted this video about how crushing it can be to keep anxiety bottled up inside. That essentially, we end up leading a double life: the life we project to others of confidence and contentment, and the internal life of worry and fear. Trying to keep up with both of these identities can be taxing and lead to even greater anxiety. Here is the video:
DEVELOP WORKING RELATIONSHIPS WITH COLLEAGUES
A great resource to me has been in joining what is called a “mastermind” group. It’s a strange name, I know. Basically, it is just me and two other colleagues meeting twice a month via video chat to discuss our challenges and successes, and provide advice to each other.
It is more personal that a forum or group blog because it is so direct. The three of us are able to be completely honest because nothing is public. You could argue that even venting alone can alleviate anxiety, but feeling as though you have a couple of smart people who are truly “on your team,” does so much to help you work through difficult challenges.
Many writers have this with critique groups and similar systems. It is also why so much of my work has a personal component to it, and not just about providing information. Having colleagues matters. It is about more than just knowing what to do, but actually working through the process of getting it done.
A recent client of mine who published a book also does high end consulting with leaders of mid-sized companies. He explains his work this way: “People pay me to live with their anxiety.” He takes on their problems as his own, and the value of that is living with the uncertainty, and working through it.
A few months back, I discussed this topic in relation to a prominent video blogger being honest about their own fear in a video entitled “I’m Scared.” This is another response to that from Hank Green, where he explores anxiety and the creative process:
PROTECT YOUR CREATIVE ENERGY
Anxiety uses up your creative energy. For many, dealing with anxiety pulls from the same place – you are searching for solutions, and looking for new angles – just as you may when approaching your creative work.
So many writers I speak to are trying to find time to “do it all.” To attend to their writing, their family, their day-jobs, and then connecting with readers. Treat each challenge with the appropriate resource. Don’t use up all of your best resources just dealing with anxiety. There will ALWAYS be things to worry about. If you don’t establish boundaries to protect your writing time, to best utilize your creative energy, then you will always feel a bit behind the curve.
Now, I won’t pretend that any of my reflections here are earth-shattering or based on proper research. They aren’t. They are merely my experience working with hundreds of writers, and considering how to live a creative life that feels good, instead of one that feels a dollar short and a day late.
How do you cope with anxiety as it relates to your creative process?
Thanks.
-Dan
Dan Blank is the founder of WeGrowMedia, where he helps writers share their stories and connect with readers. He has helped hundreds of authors via online courses, events, consulting, and workshops, and worked with amazing publishing houses and organizations who support writers such as Random House, Workman Publishing, Abrams Books, Writers House, The Kenyon Review, Writer’s Digest, Library Journal, and many others.
A most thoughtful blog. I haven’t seen anyone else touching on this topic. I esp love the Jim Carrey quote. Just try to imagine that scenario and then think what your new worries would be. Very hard. Until you are sitting in it. Yet, I have had many times in my life that I got that one thing and it really didn’t fix anything. So, thanks for the food for thought.
Patti,
Thank you. I often think that people try to rid themselves of anxiety, when really it may just transfer to something else. All is relative, I suppose! This is a topic that I hear about all the time, but only in hushed tones.
I appreciate the feedback.
-Dan
Curiously, I haven’t had a problem with anxiety when it comes to writing, except in one area and it’s not an area other writers mention when they talk about fear. I’ve never had a problem with confidence or feeling like a fraud; mine is that if I came up against a tight deadline, I might not be able to produce fast enough. I keep hearing about people producing a book in six months; people talking about doing 2K a day; people talking about how you have to have to produce even more than before. Yet, I have weird problems that most writers don’t have, and that’s caused problems with the revision and made it take a lot longer. I’m hoping all the hard work I’ve done on the current project will cause the next one to get finished faster, but until I do it, I really have no idea.
Thank you Linda. Speed is just one of MANY ways that some writers are trying to find opportunity within publishing. Clearly, it is NOT for everyone, and in fact, it is probably not for most.
Either way, I hope you find a process that works for you!
-Dan
This is a really lovely post. There is no easy answer, but your suggestions are very practical.
We are often anxious because our mind values worry, in the belief that it will protect us or stop us from forgetting things etc.
The more we try to push the anxiety away, the bigger it can become. Funnily enough, a good way to deal with worry is to set aside a worry period and gently tell yourself ‘I’ll worry about that at 4pm.’ This habit can slowly teach our minds that we don’t have to worry about things all the time.
This is a really good topic for writers. Thank you for covering it. :)
Jessica,
Thanks for the suggestion! And I agree, I think anxiety is there TRYING to be a good thing for us. But perhaps it is the pace of life, or perhaps it has just always been this way: it can make people feel trapped.
Thanks for your comment.
-Dan
I needed this post so much that I got teary-eyed while reading it. Thank you, Dan!
Lydia,
Thank you for those kind words!
-Dan
There was so much good in here. Thank you! Anxiety certainly is a part of my writing life. Your suggestions for how to deal with anxiety are great.
I’d add this one that works for me (sometimes more, sometimes less): I remind myself that anxiety doesn’t mean I *can’t* do something, it just means I’ve emotionally twisted myself up about doing it. I remind myself of times I’ve been anxious in the past and how I did the thing anyway/made the decision. And then I take a deep breath and just get started. On anything. Merely getting started can make much of the emotional twist fall away.
Natalie,
Great advice – thank you! This reminds me of that quote about the brave people: they are not without fear, they are simply the ones who are afraid too, but proceed ahead anyway.
-Dan
Hi, Dan.
This post came at a perfect time for me. Anxiety has been paralyzing me for the last week because I took a huge gamble: and I’m not sure if I’m more anxious about it happening or about it not happening.
Your first three bullet points were right on the nose, and those of us raised to worship traditional success seem to have those mocking voices inside, telling us to get a real job.
And the flux in publishing right now doesn’t ease the anxiety; but talking about it, acknowledging it, seems to help.
The latest edition of Poets and Writers had an article obliquely dealing with the same issue: the fact that authors live in silence, waiting for reactions, waiting for readers. The article is “The Calm Before the Calm,” and it was also reassuring.
Anyway, thanks for the great post; maybe I can avoid tripping myself out today!
Best,
Jodi
Jodie,
Good luck with the “gamble!” And thanks for the tip about the other article, I’ll check it out.
-Dan
I enjoyed this post very much. It’s good to be reminded that writing is the least stressful thing I’ve ever done. Yes, success can be elusive and it is a nail-biting concern for many people. But, I suppose I was saved from that with writing. My first successes were all in poetry, so when young I learned right off the bat that writing success was not about money.
If I think back to the real stressful times in my life –they all had a few commonalities:
–I was not in control of what was happening to me.
–My hard work contributed to someone else’s fortune, not mine.
–I had no say in the direction I was taking.
–I earned the failures but not the successes.
With writing I have none of these problems and if I remember this, I sleep easy! I have little post-its on the wall:
–You are not sequencing DNA.
–You are not a caregiver today.
–You can write about anything you want!
Works for me!
Cris,
Those post-its are brilliant! I like how you frame this and try to find order in the chaos that our minds/emotions can give us sometimes. Very helpful – thank you!
-Dan
Wow, you always seem to be speaking right to me with your blog posts! Anxiety has really impeded my progress on my novel– I’ve had real doubts it was any good and was about to scrap it. I think now that I’ve let it rest a while I’m going to rework it he outline and start again! Thank you for the encouragement (even though I know it’s not just for me!!)
Great post. Love the Jim Carrey quote … actually, that would apply to many of the what ifs — If I have more time, more money, newer computer, more space, another wife … it’s not the answer.
When life gets overwhelming I take a nap. Kids, cooking, writing, deadlines. An hour nap is not only refreshing, but somehow I’m able to prioritize and get the most important things done.
Thanks. I’m a big fan of naps too. But the flipside applies here too… sometimes anxiety causes insomnia in folks – they can’t “switch off” their brain from working through issues.
0Dan
Yeah, and insomnia makes me so much more rational about my work and goals. (Do I need to hold up a sarcasm sign?)
Agreed. And no sign was required.
:)
-Dan
This is super helpful Dan. As a counselor and a writer I have found that the one thing that separates me from the people who want to write and don’t is that I have a masters in counseling and know how to talk myself through the fear and anxiety. I wish more aspiring writers would do their homework in terms of cognitive reframing and other helpful techniques so that crippling fear wouldn’t keep them from being successful. Anyway, thanks for the post.
Katie,
Great advice! Build the skill, get the tools, etc. Smart.
-Dan
Hi Dan,
I LOVED this piece. I wrote about anxiety earlier this week after being struck by the different ways my husband and I see the world. I’m wracked by self-doubt while he’s supremely calm and confident.
My anxieties stem in large part from an up-bringing at the hands of a Narcissistic mother and Bipolar father, and my own resulting Borderline Personality Disorder.
I’ve recently started on Julia Cameron’s “The Artist’s Way” and am working through the exercises designed to help me identify and heal the issues that are blocking my creativity, trying to smooth away the tough scar tissue that’s built up over the years.
I guess half the battle is facing those fears instead of trying to suppress them, but some days it feels like a never-ending battle. I try and explore the feelings so i can use them to be a better writer, but it goes against all instincts to look an angry bear in the face!
Aisha,
Thanks for sharing this. I tend to find that even confident people can experience anxiety in less-obvious ways.
Great to see you are working through deeper issues to get at the good stuff!
-Dan
What an excellent, helpful, compassionate essay. I realized several years ago that being able to tolerate anxiety is a big part of the writing process. And that’s before you ever encounter the marketplace. Thank you.
Thank you Laura!
Dan, thank you. This post was tailor-made for me today. Some good things are happening with my writing, but even the good things produce anxiety! I find it hard to live the moment without projecting what might be (or not), when so often what *might* be is outside my control. I’ll definitely file this piece for future reference.
Another brilliant choice of subject written with your characteristic authenticity.
I had to think of Brene’ Brown’s work on vulnerability. Could it be that our anxiety could be our best friend as writers?
Shirley – thank you! Brene is such a great person to bring up. I’m seeing her next week at a conference in NY too.
Thanks!
-Dan
As writers, we are encouraged to fill our stories with conflict and angst. Then avoid both in real life. Thanks for the reminder that anxiety lives in everyone.
Thank you Mary Jo!
I was very interested in this blog. I had written a story about 8 years ago. The best and worst critique I got was that what I had written was to technical. It could be used for the medical and counseling type situations. The critique was a good point of view. I have not touched the book since. It is not what I wanted. I wanted a book that people would read.
I suppose I am grateful for the time. I am not so close to the issue anymore. I think I can write the story now without the fear of hurting someone in the process. I have decided to take a different prospective and fictionalize the story. It will probably be harder to do, but it could be more interesting. I have been writing stuff done for the book and hope to start writing it no later then Monday.
Thank you for the blog. Lori Owen
Oooh – good luck on Monday!
-Dan
Thank you for this helpful article, Dan.
When I’m feeling anxious I grab a pen and my journel. Without being judgmental, I pour my emotions onto the page. This viusal self-talk is my most effective tool.
That is a terrific idea and one I do frequently. I actually try to journal daily, something I learned from the book THE ARTIST WAY. It does keep a lot of anxieties away. Thank you Leanne.
I’m with you, ladies. Journaling my writing process has enabled me to transform it. It used to trigger fear and huge anxiety and now it is actually grounding me into who I truly am, one page of my journal at a time. :)
Very smart – thanks!
I’m recovering from crippling anxiety symptoms that forced me to stop writing altogether and this is what’s been helpful to me: 1) to accept that the anxiety is there and that it does not define who I am or what I can accomplish. To “fight” it or consider it bad is counter-productive and sometimes even harmful. 2) to take a look a the beliefs behind my feelings and re-frame them (this takes a while and some commitment). 3) the daily, constant practice of TRUST. Experience has shown me that life has a way of sorting itself out and words have a way of finding their way into my mind. There’s no magic recipe. It takes practice. Practice trust and practice writing. Little by little, progress will set in. Any creative endeavor requires that we let go and trust. Great post. So relieved to see that I’m not the only one with this issue. thank you!
Maryse,
Wow – that is all incredibly helpful advice! I love how you frame this, and how you are talking from experienced. Bummed to hear anxiety put you that deep in the hole, but glad to hear you are working out of it.
VERY much appreciated.
-Dan
This is very similar to my technique. I referr to it as “leaning in” to anxiety (since long before Sheryl Sandberg gave that phrase a whole different meaning). Like surfers ducking under the waves instead of trying to power over them, I give into my anxiety when it’s really bad. What inevitably happens is: (1) when I dive into my anxiety the situation never seems to warrant the level of fear and (2) I quickly get bored with being miserable and afraid.
Somehow being bored by anxiety makes it seem less of a threat.
Anxiety always comes back, but when I allow myself to dive into it instead of fighting it, it seems that it’s less intense and I can get back on track a little faster.
I also want to add that Dan’s comments about how other people can’t see our anxiety is a problem. I’ve had people comment to me about how “cool” and “together” I come across. The first time someone said that to me I was shocked speechless. I feel as though the whole world knows what a mess I am. But, evidently I fake it well.
That makes me want to remember that when someone else is fretting about something that seems trivial to me, I need to remember how trivial things are often huge hurdles for me. I must not trivialize someone else’s anxiety. But, as a friend, I also should not let them use their anxiety as an excuse to give up.
I like the idea of mutual support for anxious people.
Thanks, Dan and Maryse.
Meredith, I can relate to your comment about people not even knowing that you’re anxious. Those the closest to me do even know most times as I handle myself with apparent calm and control over most situations. I’ve learned to say that I feel nervous and it helps to share the load. But acceptance is key. When anxiety shows up now I tell myself to “stay” with it. It works. Thank YOU!
Thank you for sharing this! I think that others can view you (or me or anyone) as calm and collected can also reinforce hiding anxiety. We want to uphold this false notion that everything is easy and in control. That, if they knew the truth, there is something to lose.
My best conversations with people are often honest ones about balancing risk, fear, reward, and meaning.
Thanks.
-Dan
I deal with anxiety on a daily basis, not only my own (which can be significant) but with other people’s, as well. Working as a mental health professional, I have learned that anxiety is one of the biggest inhibitors to living a centered life. Your article is very good at addressing the topic! Believe it or not, I didn’t realize it was as widespread in the writing world as this. I thought I was the only one who agonized over every writing decision. :)
Some of the things I have found helpful (not only for me, but for others) is learning how brain function affects our emotions, and how to control the brain through relaxation and breathing techniques. I personally have returned to Yoga as a method of stress relief, and to increase my physical activity (which releases endorphins which help with anxiety). I use videos, I don’t go to classes, and the videos are actually relatively cheap. I imagine there’s information on youtube about meditation and breathing, too.
However, for myself, one of the things I have learned affects me the most is my attitude. When I start becoming really competitive, or lose focus of what is really important about my life (and writing actually isn’t at the top) or forgetting that writing is actually fun, that’s when I find myself becoming more anxious about it all. Being able to recognize that and get an attitude adjustment is really important for me. And sometimes, that means getting off Facebook!
Have you heard of the studies that indicate Facebook increases anxiety in users because of the comparisons people make to each other? Considering how often writers use social media, maybe social media can increase writer anxiety. Of course everyone who uses social media are going to make themselves look good. When everyone else’s career looks all rosy on Twitter or Facebook, and when it feels like yours is stuck or stalled, well… it’s anxiety provoking.
Wow – I wrote a long comment! I’ll stop now. :)
Lara,
Thank you for the thoughtful comment! I think studies on social media can be read either way. Personally, I feel it makes me feel MORE connected to others, less isolated, and more understanding of the complexity of people’s lives. Data can always be interpreted in a variety of ways. Key is to understand how it works for you personally.
Thanks for sharing what DOES work well for you!
-Dan
I was going to make my usual smartassy quip, something about “lots of vodka” – but really, that’s not true. Honestly, I rarely drink or else how would I ever get anything done? But I show my face to the world as a smartass who drinks vodka and la tee dahs and whupows and skips on down the road. And, sure, that’s me, too, to a degree.
But meanwhile, I’m often just F$*%&ng scared and worried and filled with doubt.
But you know what? I keep writing, pushing pushing pushing writing pushing. I won’t give it up/give up. It’s the thing that causes me more pain and more joy — oh the paradox of the writing life! I did, however, give up books signings and “tours” and after the first book I gave up looking at reviews and ratings and rankings — those things freed up a piece of my sanity, gave me back some torn out hair, and kept an ulcer from eating my insides to hell and back.
This is a wonderful post, Dan – thank you. Now, I’m going to have anxiety that I said too much – laughing! I’m a private, shy, reclusive person, despite my antics on social networking :D
Kathryn,
Thanks for sharing all of this here. I think that lots of folks have complex relationships to anxiety, and we use many other things to cope.
Okay, back to the antics!
:)
-Dan
WHUPOW!
Great post, fabulous topic, interesting comments. Thanks, Dan!
I deal with creative anxiety quite a lot, in myself and the clients I work with. The best resource I’ve found is the work of psychologist (and novelist) Eric Maisel. Half a dozen of his books live on my desk, including:
_Mastering Creative Anxiety_
_Coaching the Artist Within_
_Living the Writer’s Life_
His advice is exceeding useful, and well-written too. What’s not to love?
Mary,
Books are always the answer! Thank you so much for the resources here.
-Dan
I don’t know why that surprised me to read about someone like Jim Carrey or Leonardo DiCaprio being worried. It is funny how we just assume if you have money you don’t have to worry, even if we know the opposite is true. Thank you for this post because I have been suffering from anxiety daily since I began to try to develop my own business. And not because any thing has gone wrong. It is the feeling of being torn. I don’t know how many times I have wondered, “Am I wasting my time?” when I rarely stop in the middle of a television program to ask myself that. Developing creatively and producing work in never a waste, and yet, I feel nervous. Then when I am not making my art I am anxious over that. You are right about learning to cope with it. Every day I have to take the time to stop and try to get calm. I don’t want to waste my energy on worry I want to use it doing what I love. It is good to know I am not alone. Thanks again.
Laura,
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing this. It’s funny how it works both ways right? Anxiety when you are working, then anxiety when you aren’t!
:)
Very much appreciated.
-Dan
My body has always been wired toward anxiety and worry. And the thought of putting my writing out there for people to see (and criticize) is extremely anxiety-producing. But the actual process of writing is one of the rare things that helps me forget all that, giving me a good start to my day.
Interesting how the solution to anxiety can change to the cause of it when you choose to share. I suppose it all depends on your goals. Thanks!
-Dan
Such a great post. Thank you for sharing with us.
Thank you Edward!
E.B. White said: “I am not inclined to apologize for my anxieties, because I have lived with them long enough to respect them.” He was out of the anxiety closet long before I was. I now speak/write very openly about anxiety. Oddly enough, it doesn’t manifest so much in my literary/artistic endeavors (anymore) as it does, say, in driving a car.
Life required me to get really honest awhile back. Had to in order to feel less alone/more connected … so I was willing to save my life rather than my face. I suppose I’ve grown used to putting my heart and soul “out there” after years at this art/writing thing. It’s an interesting paradox — we writers/artists tend toward sensitivity … yet are asked to move through it in order to do our work.
Yes, Terri, it’s the paradox, isn’t it? We are sensitive and yet, we hold this need to share and be vulnerable for the whole world to see (and read). You express it so well.
Terri,
I love this: “…in order to feel less alone/more connected”
That is why those videos from Charlie/Ze/Hank are so engaging to me – they are just so honest.
Very much appreciated.
-Dan
Great post, Dan. Thanks.
Thanks Linda!
I belong to a mastermind group with my sisters and I can testify to how amazing it is. Even though we have goals in different areas of life, we are always able to find connections that bring balance, encourage progress, and resolve conflict. :D
So glad to hear that is working for you!
-Dan
This post is definitely in my “tool box”! Very helpful!
I blog occasionally on anxiety and as it has a constant presence in my life, it has been an interesting journey navigating through it. In my own writing process, I’ve realized that reducing social media (even Twitter which I love) is very helpful – shutting out well-meaning but unhelpful voices.
Jillian,
Thanks – I imagine the balance is different for everyone. Sometimes more voices are helpful; sometimes not.
Much appreciated.
-Dan
For me, whenever it comes to any form of creative writing, the greatest anxiety comes at the beginning and the end of any project. In the first instance, you need to develop a concept, the tone and structure. Get it wrong at that point and the rest will crumble.
Then at the end, when you’re satisfied with your work, you need to seek sign-off; whether that’s from a client, publisher or your nearest and dearest, asking for validation of your writing can be a huge cause for anxiety. Even if you are the most confident writer, you never know how others will judge your work.
Writing is the easy bit, really.
Great read and a fantastic range of quotes and videos.
Steve,
Thanks! Funny, I think a lot of people find that middle part – the day to day of writing – the difficult part. So many writers I speak with have loads of ideas, but stumble a bit on that long path between idea and “done.”
I appreciate your comment here.
-Dan
[…] Let’s Talk About Anxiety & The Creative Process by Dan Blank – Dan Blank works with writers and so understands the anxiety they can face every day. He lists some practical tips which you can try out right away. […]
Thanks for this post, I actually really needed to hear it! I’m so anxious all of the time, I’m sure I drive my friends crazy with it (despite trying to keep it manageable), and sometimes it’s so intense it refrains me from enjoying little successes.
My father was afraid of this for me, afraid of the emotional roller coaster I’d start when trying to become a writer, and suggested I try to find a way to distance myself from it. I try to, but it’s very difficult.
So thank you for your tips, and that link to successful entrepreneurs website, which I find quite inspirational!
Thanks Alessa! Sometimes I think the most powerful thing to know is that MOST people go through this!
-Dan
[…] for the tough-as-nails, just-the-facts-ma’am badassery of a select few). Writers are anxious. Dan Blank, over at the Writer Unboxed blog says so — it’s because the “act of creating invites self-judgment,” he […]
Thank you so much for this post, Dan! It was exactly what I needed to hear today.
Thank you Leslie!
Great post. As a psychologist I work from the theory that anxiety is the basis of emotional and the course of physical disorders. In working with writers or other artists, I work to have them define “why” they write and get real truthful about it.
If you say you write because you love it, judge your day by that. Anxiety comes in when you put “riders” on your work. That it has to reach a certain standing, win an agent, or the very worst–make you rich and famous. The riders are what generate anxiety.
I try to remind myself often why I write. Because I love to write. Anything else is gravy.
Compare writing to gardening. Something we do everyday because we like to grow things.
Laughing is the best cure and reminds us best of what’s important which is why I do the mysteryshrink blog. Helps be avoid taking myself too seriously.
Thanks Barbara!