List Love
By Anne Brown | January 22, 2012 |
I like a good list. Nothing says “accomplishment” like a checked box or a crossed out To Do. I dare say lists are my closest companions. Several months ago, I did a WU post on “How to Kick Out a Fast First Draft.” In many ways, that step-by-step method was an example (or symptom) of what I’m talking about.
Of course, as I said then, you can’t tackle the rewrite with a list. That part is an art that will not be rushed. It’s the time of inspired sleep, hot baths, long walks, chocolate, and maybe a drop of wine. It’s the stage of epiphanies. And–because I can not address it with a list–it is, for me, the most uncomfortable time of the writing process. It’s the swampy unease. So much so, I won’t talk about it here.
Rather, I’ll get back into my comfort zone and on to my next list:
THE FINAL REVISION
▢ 1. FIRST LINES
You’ve heard it said, your book must start with a killer first line. I’d go so far as to say that the same should be true for every chapter. Focusing in on the job of sharpening those lines is more easily done if you cut and paste them onto a single page. Work with them without the distraction of the rest of the book. Work and re-work until they each sing or zing or do something other than lie there flat and lifeless.
▢ 2. REMEMBER THE RUSSIAN
Russian playwright Anton Chekhov is known for a type of literary device commonly referred to as “Chekhov’s gun.” The notion is that if, in the first scene, there is a loaded gun on the table, by the second or third scene it should go off. If it’s not going to fire, don’t bother mentioning it in the first place. Conversely, if you know the climax will involve a gun, by all means make sure you’ve planted the gun in the early scenes.
▢ 3. ENHANCE THE SCENE
Look at each chapter and identify its mood (hopeful, terrifying, celebratory, mysterious…). Go in and enhance the mood with colors, weather, verbs, clothing, etc. Perhaps some of these details are already present from earlier revisions, but see what you can do to do more.
▢ 4. GET RID OF DOG TAGS
Search for words like exclaimed, questioned, interrogated, wise-cracked . . . . When they come up as part of a dialogue tag, ask yourself whether it’s a dog. Is it redundant, or distracting, or unnecessary? Nine times out of ten, “said” is preferable.
▢ 5. PRE-POSITIONED PREPOSITIONS
Get rid of redundant prepositions, for example, kneeled down. You can’t kneel up, can you? If you can, you might have a future as a circus contortionist. Delete the “down” and go with “kneeled.” Other examples, bowed down, stand/stood up, fell down, looked back over his shoulder.
▢ 6. EUTHANIZE THE PET WORDS
We’ve all got them. Maybe every other page you describe someone as “adorable,” or maybe, as you read your work, the word “just” just keeps popping up. All I have to do is just open my laptop and within the first three sentences, “just” will show up at least once. Just drives me crazy! Know your pet word. Kill it.
▢ 7. BUILD MUSCLE
Get rid of words that weaken a sentence, for example, about, almost, quite, and nearly. These words weaken every idea. Why does he have to “almost smile?” Why is she “about to arrive?” Why would anyone want to almost do anything? Make the characters act–not almost act.
▢ 8. THE BIG DUH. WATCHING, LOOKING, and LISTENING
This one is for First Person P.O.V. stories. Avoid sentences where your P.O.V. character narrates saying, “I watched as John did X.” Because it’s the P.O.V. character, the reader already knows he/she is watching–otherwise he/she wouldn’t know what was going on. “John sliced the bread” is better than “I watched John slice the bread.” See? Same thing with “I listened to John tell a terrible joke.” Just say “John told a terrible joke” and move on.
▢ 9. LAST LINES
As you did with your first lines, cut and paste the last lines of each chapter onto a single page. Do they each make you want to read further? Do they beg a question that must be immediately answered? Or are they an easy place to set a book mark and call it a night? Don’t let your reader have an easy place to stop. Your job is to keep them up so dang late they oversleep and are late for work.
Happy Writing!
Anne Greenwood Brown got her start as a traditionally published author of young adult paranormal and contemporary romance. Currently, she is a USA Today bestselling author of adult paranormal and contemporary romance (both traditional and indie) under the pen name AS Green . For more information see the Contributor tab. You can also follow her on Facebook , Instagram , and TikTok .
# 8 is my downfall. John ‘watched’ everything all the time. And my pet words are really, actually and just. I love them as I’m writing them but know they have to go.
Thanks for a great reminder post.
some great tips here, i find myself using ‘Just’ a great deal too
I especially like the opening and closing lines tip, this could be a very good exercise to try :)
Matt (Turndog Millionaire)
I love this post. Just, is my pet word and when I went through my MS removing it, I couldn’t believe just how many words I lost.
I also like point 5. It’s something I will remember and look out for. Thank you!
Anne,
Thanks for this post. You make a great point about the opening and closing lines of chapters. There’s a tendency to just begin (oh, that word ‘just’ again!) a chapter wherever the scene starts. That’s fine for the first draft, but as you point out, that approach often doesn’t grab the reader. I also like your point about deleting unnecessary words–what I call “helper words.” They are almost never needed (oops, I used ‘almost’). Thanks again for sharing these insights.
I have to be careful of the “looked/watched” thing and usually do a “find/search” to see where it’s sneaked in!
Something I notice and “everyone” does it and it always makes me say “Where else would a smile be?” *laughing* “Smile on his/her/my face” – :-D
Nice comprehensive list/reminders!
I love this blog and this post! Thanks for such helpful advice. I use “just” way too much and I LOVE the idea of isolating the first and last lines and sharpening them. Fantastic.
Thank you, Anne, for writing this post just for ME! Okay, maybe not just for moi, but it surely feels like it since I’m in the midst of brain numbing final edits of my WIP and can REALLY use the reminders/lessons.
Reading through your list, I’m excited and yet fearful””Hum, did I really consider this one….or this one…” It’s just bizarre how, it really doesn’t matter how long we’ve been writing, we still so often “forget” those things we hope will kick in at some point as instinct or second nature. And yet, here I am reading your list and feeling like a newbie just out of the box :-O
Printing this out and referring to it often as I plug along…
I know! It’s so easy to forget these little things. That’s why I need a checklist. : )
This is a really great post! I have to search and destroy just, that, searched, looked, watched, stepped, was, were…it’s a part of the editing process I enjoy, though. Like filling up a garbage bag an hour before the trash man shows up. Freeing. :)
Thanks for the great post!
Wow. This is a printable post. It’s going up on the bulletin board. Thanks for the fantastic tips.
Loved this post, Anne. Punchy. Useful right NOW. Youse a goode postmistress.
Thank you so much, Anne for your great advice and direction this morning.
ALSO, If anyone else missed your “How to Kick Out a Fast First Draft,” I have to tell you than when I went back and read that as well as today’s post I felt I won the flamin’ lottery!
Wow! Brilliant! I am often a very SLOW writer because I often see a scene in great, multi-sensory detail as I write– and it’s too heavy and too much to try to get all that down and keep my momentum mojo working at optimum speed. The result is very slow and cumbersome first drafts that take forever to write and which lack the vitality that I experience when I “see” it.
Your method of getting things down fast is exactly what I needed to hear about today. So, blessing on you and a hundred thousand rose petals strewn in your path! Thank you!
Ah, so gratifying! Thanks, Ann! I hope it works for you.
I have problems with number seven, mostly with the word “probably”.
Also, I had read a book (I think it was “Scene And Structure”) that actually recommend using phrases like “I see” and “I hear” in order to make sure “the reader doesn’t forget the POV”, or something like that. Of course, I took that advice with a grain of salt, because those phrases take up bad space.
Anne, such a great post—thank you. I’m gearing up for a big, ugly revise on the first draft of my WIP and I will definitely be referring to your list.
Anne, I’ve never seen that last tip before, but it is a great one! I’m off to try it!
Excellent checklist! These are definitely things I think about when critiquing my partners’ work, and it’s helpful to see them consolidated in one place. Bookmarking for future reference!
These are fantastic tips to keep in mind during the revision process. I keep an eye out for some of the things mentioned, but not all of them. Thanks for posting. : ) I enjoyed reading this, it’s very helpful and informative.
Thanks,
–Savanna
I too am a list fanatic, and this is one list that I’m going to print off! Excellent information presented clearly and concisely. Thank you for sharing.
Great post! I just wrote the last page of my novel this morning. And I’m printing out your checklist now. Love the idea of cutting and pasting the opening and closing lines of each chapter. Really makes you focus on those very important words and how they push a reader forward. Thanks!
Such a great checklist, Anne! Thanks!
Love this checklist! I am so guilty of having my characters nearly do something, especially laugh. “She nearly laughed” must be in my MS at least five times. I’m definitely going to watch out for those when I apply my rewrites!
“Five times?” No worries! These are GENERAL GUIDELINES (not hard and fast rules), so if “nearly laughed” feels right in the context, don’t delete it on my account!
The trouble comes when, like me, you search the document and find the word “just” come up 987 times!
As a fellow fan of the list, I think this is a great one. You’ve identified those problem areas that are so often overlooked and made them easy to deal with. I’m keeping this one for my final revision! – if I ever get there :)
“Remember the Russian” is the one I”m bringing to my critique group this week. Thanks for the great post. Going now to reread “How to Kick Out a Fast First Draft.”
Great advice. I’m guilty of several offenses. I’m going to keep this list by my side and review it often. At least until I can write without needing them anymore. Thank you so much for sharing.
Its interesting, I do not actually write books or anything like this, but I create content for a small company’s website, and do social as well, but the process for creating content, is something I always get help to, by reading professional authors blogs and articles like this one.
I am a big list fan as well, so it helps ;)
Thanks, Anne! As my recent book and my WIP are first person pt-of-view, #8 hit me hard! I think of reading this as my Continuing Education writers are supposed to do in order to grow in our craft.
What a great post! “Just” is the devil.
I’m in the revision phase now and love this list! Though I am disappointed to learn I’m not the only genius who cuts and pastes first lines and last lines to read separately. :) I would also recommend a document that is first line/last line of each chapter from beginning to end.
I love your lists! Keep ’em coming!
Great post! Definitely printable.
It’s interesting to read the comments and see what comes up. We usually write like we speak, and certain habits crop up over and over in certain locations. “Just” isn’t such a problem for me as a South African, but “that” is. He saw that the man was asleep. He felt that it would be time. He realised that it was too late. I had to strip my manuscript of thats and then replace only those which sense called for.
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Damn good list! I will print it out and use it.
Steve
Search for words like exclaimed, questioned, interrogated, wise-cracked . . . . When they come up as part of a dialogue tag, ask yourself whether it’s a dog. Is it redundant, or distracting, or unnecessary?
Are you suggesting that dogs are distracting and unnecessary? Because if so, Kismet objects.
Seriously, great post filled with smart tips. Thank you, Anne!
I like this post a lot and I think the advice is great. I have to say though, as someone who has both worked for years in animal shelters and had to put down beloved family animals, I find “euthnize your pet words” to be an incredibly insensitive and upsetting phrase. It disturbed me so much that I had to leave the article for a while and come back to it.
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