Why Every Writer Needs a Dog (by Harry)
By Juliet Marillier | June 2, 2011 |
Howdy, all! Harry here. Seeing how busy Pack Leader (PL) was, I offered to jump in and write this month’s contribution for her. Not that it was easy to get the gig.
‘Harry!’ At my suggestion PL was all surprise. ‘You can write?’
‘What do you think us dogs do all day while you’re staring at the screen?’ I responded, trying not to take offence. ‘Sleep or something?’
‘OK dude, you got the job,’ PL said, or words to that effect. ‘Get it done by the deadline and there might be a Schmacko in it.’
One lousy Schmacko? I’d hoped for better. But since the Other Dog was at my shoulder hanging on every word – she does that – it was a matter of pride to go ahead.
‘I’ll help,’ yipped the Other Dog when PL had retreated to her laptop. ‘What’s it about? Treats? Walkies? Cats? Put some cats in it, please, please, pretty please!’ Did I mention the Other Dog’s a Miniature Pinscher and excitable?
‘The column’s not for dogs, it’s for writers,’ I explained.
‘Great Dogs in Literature?’ the Other Dog piped up. ‘Critiquing for Canines? Best Dog Blogs?’
‘None of those,’ I said. ‘I have a much better idea. Why Every Writer Needs a Dog.’
The Other Dog just looked at me with her big, bulgy eyes. ‘Isn’t that kind of obvious?’ she asked.
She was right. We came up with a list of 2,769 reasons. We took it to PL and she freaked out.
‘Haven’t you dogs ever heard of a word count?’ she shrieked.
The Other Dog made her silly chirruping noise while I maintained a dignified silence. Word count? What the heck was that?
‘No more than 800 words,’ said PL. ‘Edit, dogs, edit. Less is more. Verbosity won’t win you followers.’ She told us to cut the list down to ten.
A measly ten? I tell you, I was disturbed. Seriously disturbed.
‘This is hopeless!’ I growled. ‘We’ll never do it!’
‘Get a grip,’ said the Other Dog, so I did. ‘Not that kind of grip!’ the Other Dog yapped. ‘When she said cut the list down, she didn’t mean shred it. Don’t you understand the difference between figurative and literal modes of expression?’
Min Pins spout a lot of crazy stuff.
My head buzzing, I clamped the red pencil between my teeth and began the editorial process.
‘Kill your darlings,’ the Other Dog suggested.
We culled to 1,000. Then to 100. And finally, after lengthy discussion punctuated by regular snack and nap breaks – see attached image – we were down to the top 10. And since the word count is already 452 excluding the title, here they are:
- 1. A dog makes you take breaks. Breaks are good for your health.
- 2. A dog makes you take exercise. Ditto. And it’s fun!
- 3. A dog loves you even when the whole world hates you. A dog loves your book even if it’s a heap of poo. If there’s anyone who understands poo, it’s a dog.
- 3b. A dog loves you even when you hate yourself.
- 4. One look into a dog’s eyes, and the world seems a better place. (I should get a job with Hallmark Cards.)
- 5. Living with a dog teaches you about love, loss, forgiveness, generosity, loyalty, courage and a lot of other things, including sausages.
- 6. In the company of a dog, you can enjoy being ridiculous. You should hear the little ditties PL sings to us when no other humans are within earshot.
- 7. A dog is a reminder that being rich and famous is not everything.
- 8. A dog gives your day structure: up, walk, feed, write, nap, walk, feed, write, sleep.
- 9. Walking with your dog refreshes your brain. PL gets some of her best ideas while walking us. It’s about time she put us in the Acknowledgements.
- 10. Dogs are an endless source of inspiration. Except for Min Pins. (Joke.)
Footnote: We’ve heard some writers prefer cats. We just don’t get it.
Photo © Juliet Marillier May 2011
Juliet Marillier has written twenty-four novels for adults and young adults and two collections of short fiction. Her works of historical fantasy have been published around the world and have won numerous awards. Juliet’s most recent series was Warrior Bards, of which the third and final book, A Song of Flight, was published in 2021. Her collection of reimagined fairy tales, Mother Thorn and Other Tales of Courage and Kindness, had its trade release in 2022. Mother Thorn is illustrated by Kathleen Jennings and published by Serenity Press.
Juliet is currently working on a two-book fantasy series. The first book in this duology, The Amber Owl, will be published by New Dawn in February 2025.
When not writing, Juliet looks after a small crew of rescue dogs.
I wish my other half understood this necessity :(
I couldn’t agree more. I’ve had a few dogs in my life (they were lucky, but I was even luckier to have them), and everytime they are different from the previous one.
I know a lot about loss of a friend (as probably does anyone who has love for animals). It’s hard, but the time they spend with us makes it all better.
Right now I only have one (I live in a small apartment, so no space for more), and I found her on the street, starving and so small. At the time I had another dog, so we tried to find someone to keep the new one, but no one would take her (people say they’re cute, but when it’s time to take responsability …). So we kept her, and she’s the joy of the house.
I couldn’t imagine my life without a pet (be it a dog, a cat or a bunny). They just have a way of making us smile, even ehwn life seems so … bleak. :)
I have a dog and a cat! Couldn’t imagine life without them.
Now that was funny … I have a cat who is dog-like in behavior! Has to be laying at my feet all the time and following around!
My dog helps me plot as we walk but she’s not very good at catching my typos.
I did not realise the Other Dog was a closet intellectual. Apparenty Harry didn’t, either. But that’s a darned good article they’ve come up with.
Ask them if they are any good at fiction. You could hire them out to people like me:-)
I love this post and your list, and I couldn’t agree more! I would also add that because I work at home, my lab Abby is the one I spend most of my time with! Now she’s getting older and really slowing down; it’s hard to think that I will someday lose my faithful companion and best co-writer I’ve ever had. Sigh, sorry to be the downer commenter :(
Julia, that’s one reason I have more than one dog. I lost a very dear little friend a couple of months ago and I’m currently dealing with the increasing frailty of my very elderly Maltese, whom Harry neglected to mention. The others are a big comfort at these times – there’s always someone to hug.
Juliet, this has to be one of the most smile-inducing posts ever written on WU! I don’t have a dog, but interestingly enough, all 10 of these in a way apply to having a baby (especially #1 ;-) ), and I do have one of those!
I’m one of those crazy writers that prefers cats, and mine does get involved in the writing process. She’s quite opinionated. Dogs are cute, though.
All good reasons.
Plus, people love dog pictures, so they make one’s blog just a little more appealing :).
There is truth in the old saying “Man’s Best Friend”; But for me it’s “Woman’s Best Friend”. ;)
This makes me miss our dog. We lost her two summers ago, and I still think of her almost every day.
We’re petless at the moment. Cat allergies and a yard we can’t fence in an area with deer, bears and mountain lions are holding us back for the moment. I’ll have to live vicariously through yours.
Our dogs truly are apart of our family. I know that im not alone when I say that we wouldn’t know what to do without them. Something about coming home every day to something that is always smiling just forces you to smile regardless how rough of a day you just had!
I love number six the best! I have a special individual song for all my dogs and as much as my family thinks I’m a bit “odd” I hear them singing along!
Patti
Love it! Dogs are also good for character research (ie, The Look):
1. Tragic look. (It’s three hours past walk time…)
2. Guilty look. (oops…)
3. Sulky look. (You LEFT ME at the groomers.)
3. Big happy grin look. (Welcome home! Welcome home! Hallelujah!)
4. Bliss look. (yeah…rub the tummy…ah…)
This is too cute! LOVE it!
Love this post! In fact, I had to go play fetch in the middle of reading it. :)
Tigger totally agrees. When I’ve spent too much time at the computer, she sits next to me and puts her head on my knee. If I don’t acknowledge her soon enough, she’s learned to flip my mouse hand with her nose.
Casey and Max wholeheartedly agree! They also wanted me to say Hi to Cousin Harry for them.
Casey and Max Poodle Doodle ; )
Cats seem to get all the props in the writing world, so it’s about time our canine friends got some representation. Our little rescue does have some cat-like tendencies, though, so it’s like two pets in one.
I’ll add a plug for the dog and cat household. Blind adoration seems best tempered with the particular humility created by feline disdain.
Every. Single. One. IS TRUE!
I had no idea until I quit my job and started writing from home full-time, but my dog really does make me more focused and productive. (Except when he barks. Darn hounddog in him…)
This post had me grinning from ear to ear, thanks!
Such a great post! My dog Maggie is ultimate writer’s friend. She takes me on walks when I need to get away from my desk for some fresh air and new ideas.
Kismet wanted to tell Harry “Write on, doggie!” Thanks for a fun post.
Alas, I live in an apartment, and have to suffice with a cat (who is at least pretty dog-like in his affection, and young enough that he still wants to play all the time, making me get out of my chair).
“The other dog…” *snort* That’s spot on!
I confess. I need my dog with me when I’m writing so much that I smuggled her in with me when I was a writer in residence. Don’t tell anyone.
Loved his ten points Juliet – and I was a little spun out that his name is Harry. I’m inspired – I need to get our Harry behind the keyboard soon too.
Brilliant, *woof*! Now pass the Shmackos!
Pack Leader here. Harry says hi to all your dogs, and woof to your cats. Pip says hi to any dogs named Pip, Pippa or Pipsqueak, and wants me to tell you that Harry is an unreliable narrator. She is, in fact, Top Dog, and Harry is the Other Dog. We also have a retired Top Dog.
Another good reason to have a dog: The author photo with dog on the back cover of your book. Draws attention and is a great conversation starter at book talks!
I agree, though I think you could revise the title to “Why Everyone needs a dog”:)
Hahaha. Perfect. Jack approves.
[…] Juliet Marillier at Writer Unboxed discusses “Why Every Writer Needs a Dog (by Harry)”. As an owner of a Golden Retriever, I have to say that the structure of my day is very much like […]
My dog smells, pulls on the lead, makes me carry his poo around in a bag, he chews shoes, garden ornaments, he is impatient, he barks at me when I don’t attend to him promptly, he sheds hair,sits on forbidden furniture and lays on beds which are off limits. He is currently on my bed where we just had a huge cuddle where I kissed his slobbery snout and sniffed his floppy ears. I could not live without him!
Fabulous blog and fun comments too!
I don’t get it. Now, a post on why every dog needs a writer might make sense … at least, I know I’m blessed to have my own writer. Of course, she spends far too much time with a computer in her lap, when her hands would be better used for tummy and ear rubs. But she travels a lot in an RV so she can write about what she’s seen and done, and I get to go along. It’s far from a vacation, because I have to protect her from dangers on the road: boxy vehicles, other four-leggeds, windshield wipers, windmills, cylindrical bales of hay, and—worst of all—bridge overpasses (which are actually the jaws of giant beasts, ready to bite down on the RV if I don’t bark them away!). But there are always new people to pat me and new smells to absorb wherever we stop, combined with the eternal gratitude of my pet writer, and that makes it all worthwhile. So Harry, I’m glad you have a writer; take good care of her!
your friend, Sallie the beagle