Kicking myself in the butt
By Kathleen Bolton | December 26, 2007 |
Originally posted July, 2007.
Did you hear that thin cry out in the wilderness, like that of a vulture tearing at her own heart? That was me trying to get back into the groove of writing after a three-week (unintentional) break.
I finally started hacking away at my neglected wip this weekend, but only after I engaged in some sadistic butt-kicking. Man, I did not want to re-habituate myself to the grind.
I’d become artful in my excuses to myself, too. My schedule was all messed up because of the coastal time change. I’d just gone through a harrowing personal experience. My house was a mess. I needed to replenish the pantry and cook elaborate healthy foods because my husband fed my kid pizza and Kraft Macaroni ‘N Cheese for two weeks.
Finally I faced facts. I was just lazy.
Here’s what I did to get myself back in the habit of writing:
1. I realized that it’s more painful NOT to write than it is TO write. I got tired of fighting the vague anxiety that comes with knowing that the time that is ticking away will not return. Ever.
2. The night before, I read a chapter in a really good book. That always gets my writing juices flowing, reading delicious prose. The ole’ hankering began blossoming again.
3. I got mad at myself. WTF? Sit down with the frickin’ thing, damnit. (I listen to myself more when I curse).
4. I gave myself a one-hour block of time to dip my toe in. Who could feel pressure in an hour devoted to anything? After that hour, I told myself I could stop, even if I did nothing but stare at a page, drooling on my pencil. Which was pretty close to what actually happened.
5. I gave myself permission to toss what I wrote in that hour. It was a mess, too, but I saw ways of fixing it up. Later.
6. I reminded myself that I’m a writer, and writers write. They don’t wring their hands, lament fate, decide to clean under the fridge instead. Instead, they do those things and then they write.
It worked. I’m writing again, and instead of cursing myself out over my laziness, I’m fuming over a plot point.
It’s good to be back in the saddle.
Photo Credit: Terelkin
Kathleen Bolton is co-founder of Writer Unboxed. She writes under a variety of pseudonyms, including Ani Bolton.
She has written two novels as Cassidy Calloway: Confessions of a First Daughter, and Secrets of a First Daughter–both books in a YA series about the misadventures of the U.S. President’s teen-aged daughter, published by HarperCollins, and Tamara Blake, for the novel Slumber.
Good for you, hope it keeps on flowing! Another trick that sometimes works is to read something great that YOU have written previously.
Brava, Kathleen! And welcome back. :)
Actually, on number 6, I find I’m more productive if I write first then clean. As long as I keep writing, I don’t have to clean.
I know what you mean about breaks messing up your schedule and mind set. That’s true for both writing and dieting.
Nice post, Kath. I’m glad you’re back in the saddle.
Aaaahhh, thank you. This was exactly the post I needed to read right now!
It’s hard to get back into it – it often takes me a few days before I really feel like I’m in the groove again.
Glad you’re back at it!
I finished my uni exams two weeks ago, and promised myself that I would write for at least an hour every day. Did this eventuate? Unfortunately, I am also the master of excuses, but I’m putting my foot down – enough is enough, it’s time to kick myself in the butt!
Thanks, everyone, it’s good to be back.
Now the new HP book is going to play havoc with the sched. Must. Write. Own. Stuff. First.
Hi Kathleen,
Don’t feel bad. All writers do this. Sometimes, you need a good break so you can come back with more creativity.
I’m currently working on 3 novels right now. One is complete and two are in the beginning chapters. I’ll work on one for awhile, then put it aside and pick up the next one. What I find is that when I go back to one of the novels after a week or two, I have a whole new outlook on it and I usually improve the writing or the characters or the plot.
I try to write something every night – have to make a living during the day. And I usually write for a few hours in the morning on weekends unless I get inspired or a flash of creativity strikes and then I’ll spend more time writing.
But, like you, there are always things to do around the house whether it’s cooking, cleaning or fixing something and you have a find a balance between all of them.
Happy writing!
#3 really spoke to me. Getting angry with myself always works. Thanks for the good post!